While dozing in and out of conciseness while being driven to work this morning, I heard Don King announce his man of the year on the Howard Stern Show. Now as I said, I was half asleep, so I turned to the driver and said, “Did Don King just announce his man of the year?” Once he assured me that Don King had in fact named some General from the Iraq war (Look I know his name, I’m just too lazy to look up the spelling) as his man of the year, I knew I needed to do something.
I needed to name the inaugural brickinthebox man of the year.
For this award to have any meaning, I must put the maximum effort into selecting the right individual, but where to start, I mean I should really start doing some work by lunch today, so that only leaves me 3 ½ hours to pull this off.
Step 1 – Select potential nominees
Face it, this blog hasn’t been around that long, just since October, so I’m not going to get a good feel for the year by looking through the archives for nominees. But that’s where we will start:
Tom Brady seemed to get mentioned a lot, so did Stuart Scott, Tom Cable would be a selection only Raider Fans could appreciate, as would Lane Kiffen, Peyton Manning won a Super Bowl and made at least 5,000 commercials, and I guess Bill Simmons got a lot of run around here.
Not much to choose from there, for this websites purposes, we are going to take Tom Cable from that pool, as he installed a system that actually had the Raiders look competent in the run game.
So we have our 1st nominee, where do we find the next one. Well what do I remember from the year.
Mike Vick did something stupid, so did Pac-Man Jones, Bush was a disappointment (both at running the country and the football), Clint Bowyer drove real fast in circles while drinking Jack, some little faggot shot some innocent people at VT, K-Fed actually won a custody battle, read that again, K-Fed is a better parent in the eyes of the court.
So from this group I’m selecting Clint Bowyer as the nominee, K-Fed almost got the nod, but I could give two shits about celebrity gossip and love Jack Daniels. The other guys are all asshats.
We still need a 3rd nominee, and we are almost a ½ hour into the process, we’d be further along, but the phone is ringing off the hook today, god damn it, why do I actually have to do work to get paid. I guess we’ll go to CNN’s year in review page and see what sticks out to me.
Some crazy astronaut drove half-way across the country in a diaper, Barry Bonds pissed of baseball purists, Larry Craig tapped his foot, Sean Taylor died.
That was a dead end, nobody there makes the grade for this prestigious award, Sean Taylor came the closest, but just doesn’t feel right for this site.
So I’m just going to go with my favorite piece of entertainment from the year. The movie 300 was great, so our final nominee is King Leonidas.
There you have it, BrickintheBox’s 3 nominees for Man of the Year are:
The phone won’t stop ringing, so we will return to this important task later in the day.